Only if I succeed..
Since when I started being addicted to success? The feeling to seeing the result is so satisfying that I cannot bear something that does not go my way. I crush it, smash it, until I can see success. Isn’t it a race of chasing after what is perceived as ‘good’ in my mind. Perhaps, along the way I have forgotten to enjoy the journey, to look at what’s on the road and enjoy its beauty.
Being addicted to success seems like a perfect desire, yet, it can be toxic as much as other kinds of addiction. To fall down and to stand up again is a part of living our lives that if we try to avoid it, we resist on living altogether.
As it is said, if we do not fail, we have not tried enough. We only have one life to live and the illusion of living a good life sometimes can take us away from the present. We end up saying no to the gift of life, perhaps, it is called ‘present’ for that reason.
Just like in an exam, I never remember what I did correctly, only from what I did wrong, I learnt. Then why trying to be right in the first place? Only the mess, the embarrassment, the vulnerability, we see the truth of life. Only from those we seek for clarity and meaning of life.
If success if the goal, aren’t we stop growing at the point we reach it?
